Friday, April 15, 2011

Scarlet Charlotte!

Today at work we were talking about the most embarrassing things that ever happened to us, and it gave us a proper giggle, so I thought I'd share mine and you can share yours :)  I don't take myself seriously at all and even now when I think of these, I have a little titter at myself heeh These are in no particular order....

1. A couple of months ago, I was heading to the train station from work.  I turned to go into the ticket office when I saw the train was there, but it was ok, I had my ticket in hand, put it through the machine, took it out and ran, slow mo, towards the door of the train.  It was like Baywatch, slow mo, wind in the hair, big long strides, when the doors started beeping as they began to close.  But once again, it was ok, I slid through the closing doors, smug in the knowledge that I had made it, and very gracefully at that, or not.  The doors had closed on my back leg, my front leg went from under me, I ended up on my knee waiting for the doors to beep open hehee Mortoooo but I broke my sh*te laughing the whole way home hehe

2. I was maid of honour at my friend's wedding a couple of years ago.  One of the other bridesmaids and I decided that I should give a speech in honour of our lovely friend and her hubby, who we've known for yonks.  I had rumblies in the tumblies all day since I'd never spoken in public before.  I was happy with my speech and had it written down so I could read it over during the day.  The best man had his speech too and I knew it was gonna be funny, so we had gone for the more sentimental angle.  The groom and best man always find the funny/dirty side of things and to be honest, so do I, but no Karen, this was not the time for that.  The time came.  So did the pains in my stomach.  Up I got and spoke into a mic for the first time ever in life.  What I had *meant* to say and what was written on my page was "and then James came over at the end of the summer" (Bride and I  had been in the states), what I *actually* said was "and then James came at the end of the summer", at which point the 2 lads broke their sh*te laughing, so did the rest of the guests, James stood up and gave a bow, the kids at the wedding were in stitches but thankfully didn't know why they were laughing. It was just us rudie patooties and our dirty minds hehe I was mortified but everyone loved it and we still laugh about it now :)

3. I was walking home from the train station one sunny day last year.  I decided I was warm, so took off my jacket and toddled about 5 minutes down the road.  For some reason I looked down and saw that my shirt was open down to my bellybutton!! Bra displayed for all the world to see!  I don't wear that shirt anymore hehe

4. A few years ago, while walking across the road where Dame Street and George's Street meet, I made a holy show of myself.  This was at 2pm and I was legging it to make the train.  I was nearly across the road in my absolute speed when I rolled over on my ankle and just reached out to grab anything that would stop me falling flat on my face.  I managed to grab a lamp post, and because I'd been walking so fast, swung 360 degrees all the way around the post, and ended back where I'd started.  I will never forget the look on people's faces as they tried their hardest not to burst out laughing hehe I even said to them "and I haven't even been drinking" heeh I had to make one of those pretend phone calls on the way to the station because I couldn't stop laughing and didn't want to look like a lunatic walking alone hysterically laughing hehe

5. Finally, it was many years ago, my first day of college.  Our first lecture was with the whole of the Science class, so it was one of the big ass lecture theatres in UCD.  I had to run to the loo, my friends went ahead to get seats and I said I'd catch up.  I came into the theatre at the back doors and looked down the steep stairs at the massive crowd, searching for my pals.  I started to walk down and slowly scan the faces, but they were nowhere to be seen.  Next thing, I went flying down and hit the ground and heard that awful groan of people "oooh" when someone (usually me, I fall a lot) goes flying.  I slid into the closest seat to me and died a small death.  I was known as "yer wan who fell on the first day of college" for ages hehe

So those are the ones I can think of right now, so it's your turn, share with the class if you dare hehe What embarrassing things have happened to you over the years??
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7 comments

  1. L.O.L Oh darling! Hugs! You know, almost all of your 'troubles' come up around the train/train station...time to use the bus eh?

    I really truly don't have any embarassing moments to share, and I am sorry for that...wish I'd share something here, anything! :)Great, fabulous, amazing post! Brave girl you!

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  2. Laughing out loud here while reading this :)). Love funny stories, i used to read all the time the ones from Cosmo.

    I have some funny/morto stories..usualy involves me and one of my friends, im so bad at telling them though

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  3. Oh dear these are so funny!! I am really clumsy so usually trip over a lot in public, but nothing as funny as yours :) x

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  4. AAAARgh this is my third time trying to post this comment!

    My all time most embarassing incident happened when I was 11 and in 6th class and I had to do this really hard reading in Irish at mass and of course I was sick as a dog.

    I had to go to mass as Id be in trouble otherwise so I pulled myself together and went in but had to go and puke in a bush half way through mass.

    I knew I stank of puke and was really paranoid but could do nothing about it. I had to go up to communion first and stood a little bit away from everyone else cos of my puke breath.

    Next thing I heard this really loud roaring in my ear and smelt burning - yes my ponytail which was down to my ass had caught fire on the church candles!!

    I hadnt a clue and my brother who was an altar boy said everyone behind me was going "oh holy f**k" etc!!! The priest came over and put the fire out with his hand - if I could have crawled into a hole I would have but I had to go back and sit through the rest of mass with my smoking ponytail - die!

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  5. Ahh it's nice to know somebody else does silly things too.. If I were you I would avoid the train :)

    When I was in work last summer I was walking around after coming out of the toilet when a male member of staff told me that my skirt was tucked in ... Yep to my knickers ... Morto

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  6. hehe thanks for the comments girls! Anne Marie, that is positively mortifying and feckin hilarious!! you poor thing hehe i can imagine the lovely smell of mass and burning hair hehe

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